Friday, November 5, 2010

An Ideal Halloween

Maybe next year.

I was considering writing about the "Ideal Halloween" and noting the irony that I wrote all about Thanksgiving getting passed over for Christmas when Halloween was getting even more eclipsed by both. I never did get around to it. The thing about Halloween though, is that it doesn't just lay around and feel bad about itself. It gets back at you. Hard.

Things had been going well enough, we went to a party on the 23rd. We dressed up as Napoleon and Deb from Napoleon Dynamite and made a sweet spider cake named Rufus.

This past Friday I rode the bus to school as usual, but this time Aubrey came and picked me up from school afterward so we could go on a date. We went to Tucano's with a 1/2-off coupon. Yeah suckahs. That was almost 100% amazing (I quite nearly puked after eating. Turns out you can eat too much of that bacon-wrapped fillet minon). And then we went to Boarders for a couple hours and got a Christmas present for one of the small children we're related to. All in all, a great night. We got home pretty late though, so we didn't go get my car. (We've done this a couple times before. Not a big deal.)

In Utah and, I suspect, many other places the 30th was the (in this case, very rainy) night for Trick-or-Treating. We spent most of the day at Aubrey's parents jarring tomatoes. Aubrey loves tomatoes and will not tolerate canned ones. So every fall she needs to find a source of jarred tomatoes from someone in her family. This year it fell to her to jar her own for the first time. This took approximately 6 hours and we didn't even finish. After she took a short nap, we ordered some pizza, went home, turned off all the lights so Trick-or-Treaters would think we weren't home, and watched a scary movie (Psycho, which was awesome).

Sunday morning-Halloween proper-we got up and went back to Aubrey's parents to finish those freaking tomatoes. We ended up with 32ish quart jars, which was a bit more than Aubrey anticipated, but it doesn't look like we'll be running out any time soon. At about 1, we finally went back to the Park and Ride to get my car. Which was not there. There were 5 or 6 other cars there. But not ours.

After some digging around, we've come to the conclusion that it was stolen. We've filed a report and everything, and now we're playing the waiting game. One could question the wisdom behind leaving a car out in an unsupervised parking lot for a period of 54 hours. But the real lesson here is this: If you piss off Halloween, it'll mess you up.

That's right, I slighted Halloween and then Halloween stole my car. Normally I might put up a fight to something like this, but at this point I'm ready to just come to a compromise with Halloween. From this point on, I'll always make sure to write about Halloweens before Thanksgivings or Christmas, and in return Halloween won't royally screw me over.


It's been (possibly) an entire week since it was stolen now. Therefore, it could be pretty much anywhere in the continental United States. So in case you've got any spare time, feel free to check classifieds all over the country for a silver 2003 Subaru Forester with about 130K miles, possibly Alaska plates, and a big dent on the left rear bumper and light. Not just Craigslist, mind you, but local papers as well. Get back to me if you spot anything. Thanks.

Note to They-Who-Took-My-Car: Being that you have all of my personal information from my insurance card, you might have even found this blog. If you did, two things: (1) Feel free to return the car to the lot you removed it from. (2) I expect a full tank of gas. Seriously, it's the least you could do.